Your Bucket List Doesn't Have to Be Extraordinary

When most people hear the words bucket list, they picture big things.

Skydiving.

Seeing the Northern Lights.

Traveling around the world.

Climbing a mountain.

Swimming with dolphins.

The original version of this post actually included many of those things.

But the older I get, the more I realize that a bucket list doesn't have to be a collection of spectacular adventures.

It just needs to contain things that matter to you.

What Do You Still Want to Do?

A bucket list is really just a reminder that there are things we'd like to experience while we're here.

Some might be enormous dreams you've carried since childhood.

Others might be surprisingly ordinary.

Maybe you want to see the Grand Canyon.

Maybe you want to learn to paint.

Maybe you've always wanted to write a book.

Maybe you want to take your grandchildren somewhere special.

Maybe you want to renovate an old house, plant a garden, learn another language, take a road trip, see the ocean again, or finally visit the little town you've driven past a hundred times.

And maybe your dream really is jumping out of a perfectly good airplane.

That's your business.

The point isn't to create the most impressive list.

The point is to create your list.

Stop Waiting for "Someday"

We're very good at putting life off.

Someday I'll take that trip.

Someday I'll write that book.

Someday I'll learn how to do that.

Someday, when I have more money.

Someday, when work slows down.

Someday, when the kids are older.

Someday, when life isn't so complicated.

The problem is that life has a habit of remaining complicated.

There will always be responsibilities, unexpected expenses, obligations, illnesses, schedules, and perfectly reasonable excuses for waiting another year.

A bucket list can remind us that some things deserve a place on the calendar instead of permanently remaining in the someday category.

Your List Can Change

You aren't signing a contract when you make a bucket list.

Cross things off because you accomplished them.

Add new things.

Remove something because it no longer interests you.

Change a goal because your health, finances, priorities, or abilities have changed.

And please don't turn your bucket list into another source of pressure.

The original version of this article suggested setting deadlines and regularly checking things off. Today, I'm not sure I agree.

Life isn't a race to complete a checklist.

Sometimes the dream changes.

Sometimes your body changes.

Sometimes life changes the plan entirely.

That doesn't mean you failed.

Big Dreams and Tiny Ones Count the Same

There is no rule saying a bucket-list experience has to cost thousands of dollars or require a passport.

Watch a sunrise.

See your favorite musician in concert.

Learn your grandmother's recipe.

Take your grandchild fishing.

Write down your family history.

Plant the tree you've always wanted.

Get a tattoo.

Sleep under the stars.

Visit the place where you grew up.

Tell someone you love them.

Do something you've always been afraid to try.

Finish something you started years ago.

Or simply give yourself permission to do something because it makes you happy.

Those experiences don't photograph as dramatically as standing on top of a mountain, but they can mean just as much.

Don't Forget the Life Between the Big Moments

Bucket lists are wonderful because they give us something to anticipate. The original post described them as a way of recognizing the moments that bring us joy and building memories with the people we love.

That part I still believe.

But I think there is something even more important.

Don't become so focused on checking off extraordinary experiences that you overlook the life happening between them.

The vacation may last a week.

The concert may last three hours.

The once-in-a-lifetime adventure may last one afternoon.

Most of life happens in between.

It's morning coffee.

Dinner around the table.

Laughing with someone you love.

Dogs under your feet.

Grandchildren making a mess.

Starting a project you aren't entirely sure you know how to finish.

An ordinary Tuesday that doesn't seem particularly important until someday you would give anything to have it back.

So make the bucket list.

Dream ridiculously big if you want to.

Put tiny things on it, too.

Change it whenever life changes you.

Cross things off when you get the chance.

But don't spend so much time chasing the life on your list that you forget to enjoy the one you're already living.

Because maybe the goal isn't to do everything before you die.

Maybe it's to make sure you actually lived while you were here.